Humbled...

I've lost my voice. Again. This is the third time this year. And it's because of allergies. I had allergies that caused a sinus infection, which caused bronchitis. And the acute laryngitis that comes with it. Which means I don't even have enough air to talk right now. Seriously. All that comes out is a high pitched whine. When I sneeze, it is very funny to listen to. Think of a red stir straw as my windpipe, when it should be a garden hose. Now try to force the same amount of air out. All I have is a whisper. What's hilarious about all this are the reactions I get from people when I use rudimentary sign language to explain that I can't speak, so I must point or sign to use their services. I discovered the need for this on Monday, taking my girls out to get McDonald's drive thru breakfast. Turns out, they don't hear whispers so well on the drive thru speaker. Good thing Gracie was able to translate for me. But when I go into a place and whisper that I've lost my voice, people treat me like I am severely disabled, or mentally challenged. They either start whispering at me, or talk very slowly, as if my ears have been turned off. Oh well. Such is my lot in life right now. There are people who can't talk at all. Ever. And this is what humbles me. I've been blessed with a nice voice, a voice that seems to bring joy to people who listen to it. Now it is gone for a time. Probably not a long time, but when you make your living with it, any time is a long time. I am finding that a lot of me is wrapped up in my voice. And I'm trying to fix that. God could take it away at any time. While that would stink, it wouldn't change who I am as a person. I'm finding that it seems weird to communicate with alternative means, but it's a fun challenge. The hard part is finding a way to do it that keeps up with my thought process! Until then, I'm hobbled and humbled. Hopefully it will come back soon. But even if it doesn't, I'm ready to be me. I hope. Now if only I can find a way to convince others. Cheers!